i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
So I got hit on by a gay guy. It might have something to do with the fact that I licked his nose.
And why did you do that?
Tequila
just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
9 beers later and she still looks like Gary Busey.
I haven't been able to trust a girl since spanks came out
I just foul balled at work. I had taken off my coat too… had to go to the sink wash my hands then go back to the stall and pick up my coat. I hope the guy shitting in the stall next to me didn’t figure out what happened.
I have a sudden craving for National Treasure 2. THIS IS WHY DRUGS ARE AWESOME
we are playing family charades. my sister pointed at me. everyone guessed alcoholic.
I just entered us to win a trip to Vegas for spring break. GET YOUR VAGINA READY FOR THE ULTIMATE DICK HUNT!
i need to stop celebrating other people's birthdays like they are m own.. my body can't handle a birthday every week
I didnt realize how badly my legs were scratched up from power-fucking him in the bushes until kate dumped a bottle of vodka on me. that shit burnedddd
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
In the bath trying to absorb water through my skin because I can't drink it.. That hungover
getting busted for public urination is like, a step above j-walking. you'll be fine
Did my roommate wake up in your girlfriend's apartment in drag again?
Randomize
