If you text me again I will gut all of your stuffed animals.
Really stoned
just sent my roommate on a cheese run
People in love make me want to vomit
fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
its good she wears the same dress to all the weddings so we can track how fat she's really gotten
so glad i banged her when she was skinny
That's the last time I fill my pockets with sushi.
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
Ohh man do you know how awkward it is to keep eye contact and have a normal conversation with someone while their hand is in your vagina?
The less money I spend on drugs, the happier my mom will be.
You better be Eskimo Brother-ing the FUCK out of tonight right now. Long distance 'balls deep' high five
But I don't wanna live with them bc I need to be able to walk around naked and sex on any surface guilt free.
He said his name was Tony, after last night I will refer to him as Tiny
I just want you to make me second guess my worth as a human. Is that too much to ask?
Went to my bottom drawer for my stash , gone just a note says thanks sucker love dad
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