this beer tastes like vomit already
Does it make me a prostitute if I accepted a Life House concert ticket for giving this guy head?
No. It just means your good at giving head.
He kept saying "this is a bad idea" wasn't in his vocabulary. He left at 2 came back at 6 eating frozen waffles and he had a symbol, a moped mirror, and a new MacBook. I'd say he had a good time
just woke up to a get well card i wrote myself when i was drunk. it was by the advil. i am a cocky bitch.
I just saw an appointment in my phone called "it's been a month" I think I drunkly did that after I slept with Paul to remind myself to check if I got knocked up... I'm smarter drunk than sober.
The chlamydia really affected his face.
Now I know he's not trying to fuck me. He took me to lunch at White Castle.
I ate you ate to the whole david gray album
Dude you chased a girl around the yard and then fell over the curb. Face first. You got up on your own tho so you reached champion status
Let's just say his oral game was lacking. Hell, lacking is too nice of a word to describe it.
The main motivators in my life are my sex drive and spite
My phone has started autocorrecting "monogamy" to "monogamish"
Come on, what straight woman, gay man, or bi person HASN'T scrolled through Justin Trudeau pictures after a bad day?
We had sex and then ordered pizza after. This relationship is looking good so far.
but like who hasn’t gotten fingered at the state fair?
Randomize
