My astrological sign? Vagitarius.
i always forget guys have bellybuttons
I just saw the list where the U.S. doesn't even rank in the top 10 in drinking countries. I know its Tuesday but....its for America
just walk of shamed past a man riding a bike. RIDING A BIKE. what a wholesome life he must lead.
Theres a picture of you standing next to a John Wayne cardboard cutout that says dont drink and drive. your buddy is shirtless holding a beer and youre holding your keys up with marker on your face.
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
Ice cream after masturbating>masturbating any other time
I'm doing homework tonight but if you end up going out drinking I would like one courtesy peer pressure text.
Was that you I seen riding on the top of a cab? Way to start the new year
I JUST WATCHED PAULA DEEN PUT BUTTER IN HER BLOODY MARY. This is not a drill. Real life.
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
Moral of the story: always keep condoms in your bra
I could see myself being this awkward weirdo drunk girl that patted strangers and danced terribly but was powerless to stop it
I spend so much of my life shaving my body hair off and I want nothing more than his beard in all my hairless places.
It's not my fault, Tequila turned all my alarms off.
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