just paid a stripper to have a minute conversation about the arizona game WTF
He doesn't make grammatical errors. Even while getting head.
Is it obsessive that I keep picking my crazy sex rug burn scab so it leaves a scar I can remember him by?
Even my vagina gasped.
i feel like i am carryihg a baby. a baby made of alcohol.
you are going to have to live with the consequences, i'm going to fuck your sister
I feel like when purchasing hard liquor on a Monday I also need to buy a happy 21st bday card to not seem so pathetic
there's a girl on facebook trying to buy me a pizza. I can't say no... right?
Wearing rip off pants to a booty call last night was one of my most brilliant ideas ever.
Do you remember biting my ear and whispering quotes of Pride and Prejudice last night?
I went to a community college and majored in Bad Decisions. I'm not exactly a chick magnet.
I'm jealous, curious, and aroused. All at the same time.
My job here is done.
Is it customary to send a 'thank you card'to someone who gave you awesome oral as a gift at your housewarming party?
I just revenge puked in his shoes. This is gonna be a fun night :)
It'd be good to change things up a bit, right now the only public service I'm doing from my apt is hanging out in my underwear with the lights on.
Randomize