Hey man, did I leave the bottom drawer to my refrigerator that I had beer in at your house by any chance?
She's in Spain. I'm in Holland. World Cup Final is Sunday.
Dude, it's like the Romeo and Juliet of FIFA.
i can't find my house
we droppd you off right in front! i even walked you to the steps less then 3 mins ago.
i'm pretty sure my house moved.
I think I'm on the verge of a really slutty period in my life
To say the least, now you know you're a proper lady, passing a field sobriety test in heels...
Ladystoner tip: if eyes are bloodshot, lime green eyeliner makes them appear less red. its basic artt.
Apparently I tried to convince him to sleep with me by showing him that I could do dips....
Porch rule of tonight: when you sing, you must use "something" as a microphone. The person to use the most "creative" object gets the door prize...so far Stephie is winning with Jennifer's dog.
The door opens out but somehow she managed to kick it in..
The novelty of Nekkid Straight Roommate has faded.
Uh oh we had sex and I don't think I like him anymore help
I don't know how a coffee date turned into road head. But hey
Dude I turned down free booze. I think I'm growing as a person.
I need a sign that says “please don’t make plans with me if I’ve had two or more drinks. I will regret them. I will have bitter feelings towards you. Then I will cancel and feel guilty.”
Im glad your laughing because im currently convincing my penis you didnt mean it and its all gunna be ok.
Randomize