i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
he literally just asked me which v neck he should wear tomorrow.
I was so drunk i thought Kathy Griffin was funny
After grabbing my boob for a couple minutes he then decides to ask me if I was awake.
She fell out the car soaking wet and screaming "im wearing a fedora!" then tryed to seduce him on the front lawn in front of his middle aged neighbor
he fell down during beer pong and the chick told him to rub the sand out of his pussy and suck it up. i am in love
I would have screamed and cried and bled and shit and then died. Fuck that guy.
Omg having my Grindr go off at the planned parenthood is just not okay
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
I'm a lady who knows what she wants in life, and that's uncommitted dick.
the fact that you beer bonged rum made me so proud, the fact that you threw up an entire footlong tuna melt after... not so much babe
And despite my lack of successful relationships I'm a fucking guru
That's like claiming you're a good coach but going 2-12 last season
youll appreciate my drinking habit one day...
Let me set the mood for you. Do you remember Britney Spears in her Hit Me Baby One More Time era? Well I just fucked this college girl I shit you not her name is Persephone and she looks exactly like Britney Spears back when she was hot. I might be in love.
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