I'm too high to be shopping. I just contemplated deoderant for fifteen minutes. Now testing pillows
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
I swear it started with good intentions but then my slutty side took over and we started playing strip checkers
Attempting to teach the cat how to shake. I need a job.
Wait wait wait. I remember riding in her car to the next bar. On your lap. With my head on the dashboard. That probably should have been my cut off point.
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
I asked him how his night was and he sent me a picture of a bottle of Ciroc with a bendy straw...
Chose not to courtesy flush and the CEO huffed the result. I feel powerful.
I woke up naked in her room. More precisely, I woke up naked in her room with her and her sister laughing at my penis. I hate my life.
Sometimes having a penis is like having a really stupid drunk best friend. You see it doing dumb shit but you're just not the one in charge.
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
I'm so festive that I used my jack o lantern bucket as a just in case barf bin
there were rolls with just one bite out of each one leading to the bedroom. you were laying on the bed naked and yelled 'you did it you followed the bread crumbs!'
Everyone has seen your nipples. It's like asking if they ever walked on grass. You need better hangover questions.
The kid with the ed hardy shirt put a bunch of random shit in the washer and turned it on. example: a hanger, the movie Chocolate with Johnny Depp, and your mom's cat
Randomize
