I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
i just threw up a quarter into the urinal in the bathroom at the bar. everybody else stared then cheered. that drunk
if they reproduce, their children will be the worst quarters players ever
this is the second time in my life i thought i might need to go to rehab. im including all the mornings that i wake up in dewey beach as "the first time"
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
Okay good. And who the fuck put a condom on my foot. That shit hurt
i just sent him like 8 different sexts and he texted me back about how good the hummus is that i left in his fridge.
Bloody Mary Monday just took a turn for the worst... Just had a heart to heart talk with the cat about it's obsession with chewing on cardboard.... Time for a nap.
Apparently I yelled "no stop it" in my sleep last night when he tried to cuddle with me.
Oops, guess its official. I just use him for sex.
I need a thor helmet and I need to find my heavy duty drinking mug
Did I mention I hooked up with another country star? I think I need some sort of trophy for each time, yah know? Or like a sash and I win a badge or patch for each person. Like a slutty Girl Scout.
just reached the point where my breast implants paid from themselves in free drinks.
Pillow talk?
can't do it. no eye contact either.
Where have you been all my life
and then she sorta stared at me like "holy shit" and I looked down and my dog was licking her ass
Ruff night.
I was trying not to blow up your phone, but I'm so horny I think I might die
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