OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
Just heard her singing at the school concert... I am honored my penis was touched by those pipes
I had to call maintenance to come unclog the toilet.
Something to remember me by.
In case you were wondering, my scare crow is wearing your outfit from last night.
Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
dude they had a "sorry for partying" wall in their house which consisted if all the hospital bills, tickets, detox receipts and court orders they've gotten. The ENTIRE wall was covered.
slow down on the beer.. we don't need another pentabong projectile hot dog incident
Invited the whole bar back to my place for an after party.....shit got real with everyone seeing dad drink moonshine like a champ.
I'm on acid right now in three feet of snow. I NEEEED YOOOOUUUU
He tried to reenact Braveheart's freedom scream but got tackled by his drunk roommate who thought he was yelling that the handle he was holding up was free.
I knew full well that at some point during the night my penis would be out with this costume choice
Can you please explain to me why there are 7 bags of tacos in my bed?
We grabbed as many adult diapers as we could and made a run for it.
They left me at home... I'm a liability
OHMYGOD YOU REALLY THINK I'D BE ON OPRAH?!
Randomize
