I just had a 2 1/2 hr conversation about the pros and cons of taping your ballsack to your taint, which then led into the unveilling of lady gaga being a hermaphrodite.
It was so delicious I was introducing it to people. Guy from my psych class was like "This is my girlfriend, Erica," and I was like, "This is my milkshake, Oreo."
she "accidentally" hit me with her car, its almost as if she know im fucking her boyfriend.
We're trying to leave but amy's hitting on the guy who mans the nacho cart
This is final. The chair stays in the bathroom, we are too old to be puking from the floor, grown ups sit in chairs infront of the toilet to puke.
Or grown ups don't drink themselves into vomiting.
This is amazing. I can pinpoint the window in time that you lost all sanity.
I'm wearing too many socks to be ok with this.
How many other adults do you think have slept naked under the Winnie the Pooh blanket sober?
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
The thought "Ummm which pants am I wearing? ...I *am* wearing pants, right?" just ran through my head. I'm done. So done.
I bought a vibrating wall dildo with my tax return. You?
Oh man 11pm. That means it's time to take my shirt off an eat a brownie
Wife and kids came home early...naked passed out covered in chili cheese Fritos dad will haunt them forever.
Last night when we banged she had nothing else on but socks that said 'property of Jesus' on them.
Every time I see this chick she's swimming naked at a pool party. That's gotta mean something right?
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