apparently you CAN get banned from Nascar.
I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
im not gonna bother asking u how it was... we could hear u through the walls
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
By the way, i got bored and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
Shit. We're going to have to drink until they're cute
Hello cirrhosis
I come bearing gifts of whiskey and vagina
I'm gunna send you baby bottles of vodka for those nights when you just give up
And then I cried about the Cubs for a half hour. If my dignity hadn't already been lost by that point in the night, it sure as hell was then.
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
almost dropped my phone in the toilet but it somehow bounced off my tit and landed on the floor. Boobs: saving me hundreds of dollars in bar tabs and smartphones since '09
He's got a beautiful penis, I can't lie
He seems like a nice guy. I mean, I know he's married and he's essentially paying me to be his side hoe, but he really seems like a good person.
Joke’s on you. I got to talk to a furry about why nukes are bad and why musicals are good.
It’s awful. They need to open the bars. I’m now trolling grocery stores looking for dick
Randomize
