..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
You kept hiding marshmallows in the freezer saying "they would never think to look here"
Last night at the bar my fuck buddies found out about each other.
Wtf? What happened?
Not quite sure but they rock, paper, scissored to see who was taking me home.
I think I just got a contact from my own exhale. Def dying.
Using the salt from a pretzel bag for tequila shots. Come over.
Underwear, t-shirt, bottle of Pinot Grigio and Golden Girls. I've hit a new level of homosexual.
She did my hair, then ate me out. Switching teams was an awesome decision.
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
I feel like getting drunk at the airport is sort of a rite of passage into adulthood, but maybe i should reserve that occasion for a flight thats not just 1 hr
You should have heard my farts after he left. I swear one of them was a demonic voice saying, "It's coming for you, Nicole. It's coming,".
just like cleaning my room and being more organized in my life. more so just making sure a toaster doesn't end up in my car again for 2 months
I just ate cream cheese straight for my dog
I'm afraid to ask what that means
Mischief managed.
YOU ARE NOT A MARAUDER, WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO NOW?
Alcohol. Making me feel good about myself since 2008
he's single and there are thong briefs.
Randomize
