Vanillla milkshakes are the new Gold Bond. Will explain later.
he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
I'm pretty sure we've had sex a bunch more times than we've hugged. So hugs are weird when they happen.
You rolled out of the car, got on all fours and puked then just nonchalantly stood up and waved goodbye and thanks for the ride.
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
If this herpes test comes back negative I'm asking out the doctor.
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
No our divorce decree will not have a blow job clause. Unless my alimony is greatly increased your bj's have been reduced to fantasy status.....
Why is your name on a gluestick in a plastic baggy stuck to my door?
I am not saying having unprotected sex in my boss' pool was a good idea, I am just saying it wasn't my worst idea of the summer.
GET ME OUT OF HERE THE DOCTOR KNOWS HE IS JUDGING ME I DEMAND A PRISON BREAK
No worries, I've prioritized my homework into "can do drunk" and "should be sober" categories. We're good.
I think after tonight I'm 85% lesbian
Woke up with a padlock locked onto my ear gauge and the first of many sticky note clues on my chest leading to the key.
I'm a mess. I mean I almost got off but I'm a fucking rubics cube down there so il givenhim the point
Randomize
