Please, let me fuck your mom
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
nothing says "we're all in this together" like the herpes she passed around to our entire group of friends
Semen is not good for contacts.
He bought my favorite ceral.. I've guess I've earn the status as one of his regular fuck buddies. I feel honored and proud. His roommates girls don't get this treatment.
Sean getting laid is an anomaly, Sean banging the hottest single girl at the wedding is a fucking unicorn being ridden by a leprechaun walking through mordor.
I'm just learned what a rim job is, I feel like crying
But seriously, I hug most of my drug dealers.
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
I wouldn't say I LOVE Pacman. I mean, sure, I'd battle against you in an epic Pacman struggle for blow jobs and glory. But I mean, who wouldn't?
Our sub is singing "i believe i can fly" after yelling at the class this whole time and this is really hella weird
I say I'm working from home on conference call days, but really I just mute the phone, put that shit on speaker so I can hear what's going on, and let Marcus fuck my brains out.
All my friends are getting married and I'm pole dancing in a tattoo shop. I don't know how I feel about this.
They spent thousands on one day. You made $76 in 30 minutes. You should feel great about that.
He tried to do a JoJo pose and wound up breaking his wrist in the process. Truly a story for the ages.
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