i told him that if he starts being sappy its friends = off. he called me jerkface and drew on me w permanent marker. im either in love w him or we are twelve.
Just took my morning after pill in the library
But like now everytime I pee I just think... wow I had sex with him on this toilet.
I found her in the trunk, smoking a cigarette, saying every girl should know how to get out of their trunk
Would it be tacky of me to tell the two girls I just found out he's been sleeping with on the side that I've been having gay sex with him all semester?
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
I just wanna go somewhere and not be judged for wearing spandex shorts that make my ass look like a slice of fucking heaven. Is that so much to ask??
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
I, soberly, gave myself a concussion trying to take a pic of my vagina. Fuck you and your hangover.
So do you remember the bartender that caught me when I fell off the bar 4 weeks ago? He hasn't been to work since...Woops.
my throat is bruised, my back is scarred, my vagina feels like it's going to fall off.. you're like godzilla. you destroy everything.
I also need to get my life together but instead I just eat spoonfuls of Nutella. We can't win 'em all
About to go make a man out of a 24 year old boy
As I shove my ninth taquito of the day into my mouth...
Picking our battles
What's the weirdest place you've ever had sex?
I don't think you're psychologically prepared for this conversation.
Randomize
