If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
did i get hit in the head with a hammer? someone just asked me...
What makeup look will say to the therapist 'I am a smart, well-adjusted young woman'?
the kid throwing up and laying face down on the deck just asked ME if I'M okay...
You woke up, laughed, proceeded to throw up on me and then passed out again.
Did we smoke in a portapotty last night? And if so, do you think the brown stuff covering my body is actually dirt?
It's an open bar. I'm gonna be gone when you get here.
Text me the address now before you're too drunk to text English.
He just stays over and makes naked pancakes in the morning
i just realized... if i ever hook up with someone on my bed, we'll be fucking atop my animated batman themed bedset.
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
Reminding you of hookups your brain is trying to suppress. That's what friends are fooooooooor...
he was Irish, I had to have sex with him.
she glued two packs of googly eyes on you while you were blacked out. We talked her out of using her hot glue gun.
ummmm thanks
Do you remember trying to eat the shower curtain last night...?
Randomize
