theres a boy scout troop on my plane. right now theyre playing wilderness games. let me just tell you how excited i am to hit on all of them
So, I just pissed in her shampoo bottle. Hope she enjoys a late golden shower from me.
every time i get drunk at her place i end up leaving with nothing but an empty box of toaster strudels..
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
I have got to stop singing on voicemails. I just left my dad a 6 minute musical message.
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
Last time i carry you out of a forest
She poured beer through the deck into the hot tub. She called it a deck shot. It was horrifying but super awesome at the same time.
I call BS on that! THAT WAS TOTALLY AN INTERCEPTION. JENNINGS HAD THAT.
PEOPLE ARE FLIPPING FURNITURE HERE. IN THE ROOM ABOVE ME. I HEARD SOMEONE WOOKIE CALL IN ANGER FROM SOMEWHERE IN THIS BUILDING.
I'd be lying if I said I wasn't scared, even a little.
She just drunkenly falls over and yells " I lost my footing!" in a british accent and then proceeds to run into the wall... did you spike her water?
He wouldn't let me put a red handprint on his face or scream to him everytime he walked away.
Why did you want to do any of that?
If someones last name is Wilson, you are obligated to pretend that you are Tom Hanks and they are a Volleyball and quote the movie when you speak to them.
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
So I ended the trip with two cold sores, poison ivy on my leg and vagina, and no alcohol or weed. WORST. 4TH. OF. JULY. EVER.
Randomize
