i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
so, is "hi, did i take your virginity six years ago and never call afterwards?" an appropriate greeting in a bar?
He told me I just kept sending him the word sex and dollar signs.
No, its ok. Im playing strip pretty pretty princess im currently dueling for the crown
i turned my shower on this morning and passionfruit pulp came out. how did you even do that?
I have fruit by the foot roll-ups. I wonder if a man could tie them together and make an editable bra....
Nothing says "future AA member" like bonging 40's out of a plastic flamingo.
I dunno, there's just something so\ncomforting about having his penis in my mouth.
This is my last chance to be the first person to fall off this roof.
I just realized that with the new snapchat update / emoji sticker thing I can now use easily use emojis to cover my boobs in nudes.
dollar rum and cokes, see you on the dark side of infinity
You have to commit to sexting. You can't just quit right after I send you pictures of my asshole.
Seriously, come on.
I feel like there's a picture of my ass on the internet right now.
I hate you.
U were so upset when the shower ruined ur nachos. I didn't kno what to do.
Vulcans are sexy now IT HAS BEEN WAY TOO LONG SINCE I'VE GOTTEN LAID
Randomize