every time i send "do you want some cock" to her T9 manages to change it to "anal"...i think she's mad now
why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
I think I sharted a yagerbomb.
I'll just tell her I'm here with you picking out a buttplug for her to say "I'm sorry".
Nothing quite like pre-gaming the Kentucky Derby with adderall and adderall. I'm fairly confident I could outrun all of these fucking horses in a foot race right now.
Wake your sexy ass up. It's donut time.
Omphalophobia is a real thing. don't ever fucking touch my belly button again dude
She knocked me and my drink to the ground with her ass. I have never been mad at someone for having a glorious booty.
I just want to drink cheap wine and throw my bra at an aging singer songwriter
Now I just sit back and wait to give ass birth to pure evil.
He better be a good lay, these underwear cost $50.
like when you break up with someone your virginity slowly starts to grow back & when it's done it's like ding ding ding you're ready to date again
We have sober sex! It's a real relationship.
hey can you come unlock the basement door? I'm trapped in here.
no I can't, you're a safety hazard. but, there's a beer keg down there somewhere. we don't have cups, but help yourself.
Look get the dick out ur mouth and answer the phone
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