porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
I dont ever wanna see you tell my little brother to "spread the seed" ever again
Midget Michael Jackson impersonator dancing to Beat it in Penn Station almost caused me to miss my train. God, I
i just unintentionally masturbated to my own facebook picture
yeah but it's new years. they should arrest people for being sober that day.
Matt just took me to visit my puke stain from 2 weeks ago at the train station...I'm fucking impressive
How was the bike ride?
Nope. High in the basement. Fruit cups.
There's nothing worse than waking up naked on the beach covered in sand and a family walking by.
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
Woke up Christmas Eve morning with my face smelling like ballsack.. No regrets.
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
So I was trying to finish off that sick uv whipped and I chased it with yogurt. Not a good idea
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
The only times girls talk to me at clubs is when they're asking if I'm okay when I'm puking outside. Or if it's a tranny
No other awkward car ride can beat the one you give your drug dealer home.
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