I hope mine doesn't look like that
I have now ridden the bus with a ninja, a samurai and Jesus. Who says the bus is for losers.
Superbowl and Mardi Gras a week apart. World's longest bender here I come.
so she bought me lunch gave me a blowie then paid for the gas since I drove... I think there's a catch but I'm gonna run with it
If the blowjob was before the wedding, we're not technically related, right?
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
Going to the market. I need some nachos and a serious re-evalution of my life.
I think I may be stoned foreverrrrrrrrr. The earth has been around for a long time.
Found the puke drawer
you're right. i am beautiful. like a May day. frolicking in a meadow of wildflowers. platinum in one hand. pipe in the other. that kind of beautiful.
I'll take care of you. Just let me pee on this old white person's car first.
Can you get snapchat back so I can show you all the places I threw up in/on last night?
lol I'll trade you jello for a tampon
what a trade!
I just unmatched him. If your Thirsty Thursday only consists on the gym then I am not the woman for you ✌🏻️
excused from jury duty. THAT hungover...
Randomize
