therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
sitting in my room eating a boneless rib tv dinner, and listening to taylor swift's love story, and i sharted. had to finish the ribs and hear the end of the song before i went to the bathroom to wipe.
I just threw up, I'm either bulemic or pregnant, and I'm now accepting bets on which it is
i just overheard someone saying that they invented the 'tequila mockingbird' last night. sorry, but i found better friends
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
STOP LICKING HIS MUSTACHE
All i'm saying is it doesn't matter how drunk you were, at 26 years of age you should always remember to take down you pants before you shit in the toilet
I swear that when we jog in the morning I can hear it slap between his thighs
Drinking a bawls. If I'm dead when you get home, yes, they are poisoned.
Couldn't find my swimsuit top anywhere this morning but finally found it in the skimmer of the pool so thats how my night apparently went
I can't tell if my bong is gender-neutral or not
At least they play good movies in the waiting room of the pregnancy resource center.
Just screamed wow while using my vibrator.. new low
The cat's telling me to stop taking acid, and to start doing the lords work. I'm almost 99% sure he's talking about the dark lord.
THIS CAT'S GOING TO TURN INTO A SNAKE AND KILL ME! GET OVER HERE NOW! BRING YOUR WAND.
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
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