Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
I have to look really hot tonight because my personality is going to suck.
cab driver gave us mini bottles of jd for the ride home & proceeded to run every red light. wonder how many bottles he drank.
ARE YOU ALIVE? usually when i say lets start drinking at inappropriate times you come right over. im worried
well we could tame deer to let us ride on them. does that work?
They're taking me to ER. Mistasnkingly. Come get me.
I just realized how early it is, you're taking this booty call thing to a whole other level. also, there are altoids all over my room, that was weird
Let's drink?
Just because it's bacon vodka doesn't mean it's for breakfast.
When I told him he could take naked pics of me, did I really need to specify that he could not email them to my brother's friends for bragging rights?
so...the lady doing my pedi totally noticed the human bite marks on my calf. Who says marriage ends your sex life? Love u!
It's ok, it's locked within patented Sealrite technology. That puke is staying fresh
I ended up sleeping on a park bench. Never using Tinder again.
My life is just a trash fire of work and Japanese video games now
Just sold my panties for 40 bucks to some rando dude at the gay bar. I think I found a way to fund next years spring break trip. Hello cancun!
Is there a subtle way to tell him he needs to hydrate? 8 years of yoga and kegels. He has no idea what I’m going to do to him this weekend
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