please keep texting me so i can pretend someone likes me
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
I'm already mentally preparing myself for the fact that I'll probably be sleeping next to a toilet.
It took me 6months to figure out that he only had one testicle.
Im pretty sure by the fifth subway ride after going in circles the four times prior, we all just accepted that we werent making the concert and should instead enjoy our magical weed and tequila laced journey.
The fact that he just came out makes his Lent commitment to give up gay sex so much more meaningful now.
They have 12 kegs and 40 bottles of liquor and a pool with a diving board. And hardly anyone at this wedding knows me. Should be a great night
So would it be tacky to offer my services as a future attorney as an engagement gift for her?
no, she just came home, mumbled about being a gerbil out of water then ate half cooked chicken nuggets.. normal night
I've come to the conclusion that Jesus and 2013 are haters.
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
Chris used to fill up a Camel Back for thirsty Thursday. God I really miss him, do you remember when he gets out of jail?
He gave me my financial savings if I invested with him while I was giving him a bj.
You know, this is NOT how I pictured my life would be when I was younger, and yet here we are.
Do you ever look at your life and go "i'm too sober for this bullshit"?
Every day of my life.
Randomize
