Lets drop out of school and be professionally skinny and drunk
My only options right now are Herpes, Gay, or Vanilla.
I forgot to tell you. I'm at a porno shoot today.
I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
In hindsight, trust falling your grandma was a bad idea. Sorry about that.
We got really high and decided it would be a good idea to wash towels in the dishwasher. I left before I could see the final result.
You are so lucky that drugs are going to kill you before I do.
Worst walk of shame everrr. Hopefully the thought of me walking 20 minutes in the freezing cold with someone else's sweatpants, a bra on & high heels will cheer you up today.
Oh god there are people jogging. Fuck off productive people, you don't know me.
I feel like, for the first time today, we had a healthy yolo.
The sad thing was my husband told her its ok to make out with me. Bar Tuesdays will live on regardless.
We have GOT to stop getting stoned and going out for expensive dinners.
Ive seen a birth plenty of times, pretty awesome like a bear trying to climb out of a volkswagon.
Yo I'm lookin at the cows. They're just fucking docile things
Randomize
