I don't think ill make it tonight the floor wont let me walk
no, he came in my armpit
oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
I got to work, greeted my staff, then went into the bathroom to throw up. Who hired me to run a business???
I just made my bed perfectly before realizing that I'll be too drunk to appreciate it tonight
I just bedazzled my weight watchers points calculator. You can tell I'm gay.
you can feel better about your life now. i slept with a guy who has gold teeth
I don't understand how 5 bottles of booze became normal or acceptable per 2.5 people
Well, somebody (me) put on reindeer antlers, crawled around on the floor, and meowed at people... So yeah, I'd say it was "one of those nights"
What shitty, shitty thing could you possibly tell me that doesnt top the fact that i got hammered and showed everyone i could shit while running
she gave me her number and i just said "no. cant."
Shame?!? Shame only comes from getting naked in front of strangers and it not being awesome
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
We perfected the quiet ass slap during sex so his roommate wouldn't wake up.
He gave me a brownie at the beginning of class and now I can't feel my face.
Randomize