Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
My itunes is telling me i listened to toxic by b spears 108 times last night
All I remember about walking back home was that I maced my shadow.
I forgot how few teeth there are in this state...
You came back with four clearly unattractive women and wanted to throw a dance party in my room.
He offered me a ride home but i walked. He lives by an elementary school so a 10 yr old safety officer helped me across the street during my walk of shame
she's crying and begging for her chapstick and insisting on walking home...her every thursday ritual
Thank you for making it possible for me to get laid while having peace of mind my dog is well taken care of.
He took getting"shit in your neighbors hot tub drunk" way to literally
FALSE ALARM! I didn't piss myself, I fell asleep in the shower and then drunkingly crawled into my bed
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
The bouncer said the club was at capacity we couldnt get in till ppl left all three of them pulled their tits out we got complimentary bottle service never under estimate women
Talk all the shit you want but I slept in a oversized monster truck tire last night.
Randomize
