I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
so do you, all the weight can't fall on me. I'll befriend a ball pit owner if you will befriend a drug dealer. teamwork.
If this party got busted it would be an improvement
Me too. We could do it like prostitutes. No kissing on the mouth.
I just remember her dragging me inside in a panic saying we needed mentos and popcorn I have no fucking clue how we ended up asleep in her closet.
No he can't help me find his house he is strapped to a stretcher facing the opposite direction
I owe a guy a shoe because I threw it over a fence. That is all.
Why do I even exist?
I was wondering how I got the burn marks on my boobs and then I remembered....
The baked potato bra?
DONT TALK SHIT ABOUT LUNCHABLES
They got mad when I cut the pizza with an x-acto knife. Oh well, more for me then.
Because I'm currently dying, lacking waffles, and vaguely convinced I'm an eagle
Guys are like someone else's baby; i'll play with them but if responsibility is involved i'll hand them off.
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
We have been dating for 5 months. I'm friends with his sister. Yet my number in his phone is still saved as "hot bartender"
just learned i can hear my fish chewing his food WHILE HES IN HIS BOWL. im going to have to call you back.
Randomize
