are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
So you coming over for some grilled cheese and head?
by the end of the night i am guaranteed to have less of a face than Seal....
Dude with the Beatles haircut just got his pilots license and wants to take us up to do a case race mid flight. Don't tell me networking is unnecessary.
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
His dick is longer than my foot and I'm a size 9. I'm literally kicking myself in the vagina
He needs to respect me before he can fuck me with cat ears on.
anyone who texts me today gets a complimentary picture of my mangled foot. starting with you.
ewwwww wtf when you left last night you were fine?
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.. I just figured you were drunk and needed somewhere to crash, but your no where to be found. I'll I have is this corn dog. call me when you get this. I'm worried! --mom
Fucking in bar bathrooms doesn't count as "rushing things"
In my dream I had to eat so many peanut butter and Nutella sandwiches
Never underestimate the power of titties
Someone's gotta tell him drunk sex comes before dating
Randomize
