Fuck U Mike is a golden god.
Mike give steph back her phone.
my mom heard me say 'don't squirt that at me' while me & him were in my room. She then decided to call my aunt and complain to her that she has the sluttiest daughter in town. she refused to believe me when i told her i was talking about gel.
I'm with your mom on this one.
I thought he was joking about bailing you out until I saw the picture of you and the sheep in the morning paper. Were those my boots you had on it
he was CRYING into my vagina
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
no. 1 rule of bromania: no females
i look like a southern belle. however, i am around a million kegs. so i will be a southern shitshow.
Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
I'm in public and Taylor Swift is playing. It is taking all my effort to not screech like a goat.
He cannot be your sugar daddy. He looks like a literal hot dog.
Remember when you tried to talk but you could only count by 2s?
The FEDEX guy just cock blocked me by getting his van stuck in my driveway
Dad hid the hash somewhere in my room and wont tell me where it is until i clean it. My room is spotless. The hash was on the ceiling fan...
He’s got a big dick and a big ego. This could be fun
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