wakey wakey hands off snakey
Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
the towel caught on fire outside the hottub but we were all too stoned to care
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
The girl with a dislocated arm just did an assisted keg stand. You will never have an excuse again.
I'd be there a lot sooner if these damn stairs would stop moving.
Hardly remember what he looks like and the man has seen me passed out spread eagle. I begin this journey with such a disadvantage.
You cant carve pumpkins without vodka. It's a Halloween tradition.
Hangover or death. Death. I'll have a slice of death please.
Drank a beer through my butt, how's your initiation going?
We are going to get high as balls and watch netflix
THIS IS WHAT BEING AN ADULT LOOKS LIKE
Awkward sister question: which game of thrones female left would you fuck?
Running late for a date because I couldn't get my clothes out from under the dude I spent the night with in time to leave when I planned. This is my life.
I didn't think it was possible but he dislocated his thumb during intercourse last night then cried
Yeah plus that night got so disgusting it's basically a repressed memory anyway
Randomize
