Not that I thought your boyfriend was a phile
But the whole crossing guard thing? Weird.
Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
ive decided theres a fine line between accepting money for sex and letting someone buy you late night taco bell and knowing that if he hadnt you wouldnt be in his bed right now
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
you were leaning against the vending machine asking if there was a shower you could puke in.
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
Come down. You're the next contestant on this bowl.
He asked me "did you used to go to church" while we were having sex.
I went from naked with lasts nights hookup to Ihop in 6 minutes flat
I think that's a new house record
When did it become normal to wake up in the middle of the night to take a group bathroom break and have a 10 minute discussion on where the next football game is?
I guess that's what I get for clicking on a link that says clown penis.
He's been watching the World Cup too much because right before he came he screamed "NUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" for half a minute. Our landlord is not happy.
Ever since we've gotten back together, it's like the ghosts of booty call's past have been hitting me up. Lol.
Is this what it's like to be an adult? You plan out play dates for your vagina?
Sorry I didn't call this morning. Ended up with a decorated war veteran last night who besides finding the enemy, KNEW where the fuck my G spot was. He gets a medal in my book!
Randomize
