she's got a whisker from her dead cat taped to the wall. I'm pretty sure that about sums it up...
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
Drunk. I slept-stripped.
By myself.
they need to invent a card that reads "thanks for all those boners you gave me that you did NOTHING about"
Nope, can't do it. It's a snowball effect. Today, leggings as pants. Tomorrow, female hitler. Natural progression.
someone wrote my own number down on my hand and then call me.
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
I'm trying to get weird tonight. Like I want to see bitches crawling on all fours drinking milk from bowls and shit by 5 am. You down?
Someone explain to me why I woke up to find a stolen shopping cart in my room...
I walked over and you were apologizing to him because you're lady gaga and he's not. The best part was that he forgave you.
He told me to grab his penis so I did and swung it around and said “awe, it looks like the wacky inflatable tube man.
Certain restrictions may apply. Common side effects of sex with me include unbridled joy, a healthy glow, soreness and the inability to walk for short to long amounts of time. If any of these side effects occur please consult your physician, so he/she can prescribe me a "high-five".
This girls ass literally just fell out of her jeans in front on me on the escalator. Going commando on a Monday morning is a bold move.
Come cuddle! I'll be passed out somewhere in the library. It'll be like a scavenger hunt!
Randomize
