DUDE DUDE I JUST GOT TH E BEST IDEA FOR A CHILDRENS BOOK "If You Give A Girl A Blow Job"
And her vagina tasted EXACTLY like a slim jim
The boys in front of me put beer, red plastic cups, ping pong balls, lighterfluid, and twelve packs of pantyhose on the conveyor belt. Whatever drinking game they're playing, I want a part in.
My google history shows every combination of "red lobster cheesy biscuits" possible.
She is singing the swedish chef song and throwing utensils. I love this place
Yeah... I was considering changing that part but the boxed wine is non-negotiable.
I'll offer my penis as collateral. You can hold title to it till I pay you back.
he has decreed that i can sleep with anyone who has the same name as him. line up all the toms
Bartender just fed me brownie. Its going to be a good night
Oh thank the gods of upholstery, i thought that was never coming out...
You've gotta make sure the carpets match the drapes, though.
I am not dying my bush blue.
I shaved my entire vagina for a man who had the personality of a potato and a C- orgasm. Life is a series of disappointments.
some kid just came up 2 me bleeding yelling "thats how u riot"
I’d feel the same about religion. We can talk about it, but I want you to go down on me first
He passed out while I was riding him but stayed hard long enough for me to orgasm. He definitely earned the blow job I’m going to wake him up with in the morning!
Randomize
