trying to fathom saturday night and the fact that Rainn Wilson now hates me. my brain hurts.
you made me watch la bamba, and then you yelled at me for disrespecting your mexican heritage.
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
We were eating hotdog buns dipped in French onion dip in lawn chairs at 4am. That drunk
Thats not how it works. You get the Rachel, and then Rachel kicks you out. Don't linger or try to cuddle, its just pathetic and makes me look down on you and your penis
I've decided I'm going to drink again. More. Day drinking. Night drinking. Everything. It's the responsible thing to do since I'm not pregnant
I didn't think four grown drunk men could cuddle on a twin size bed, but we found a way.
Nothing like having your house arrest ankle bracelet vibrate and take a moisture sample at the exact moment you're about to blow it in some chick...buzzkill
That guy has been pretty randomly in and out of my vagina for 4 years...I don't think I'm required to tell him when I'm dating.
Good point.
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
just had sex in my dorm hall public bathroom while wearing my favorite cat sweater. tonight was a win
I was a plus one at an intervention for a person I didn't know.
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
He was trying to break into my apartment to get the coke he left last night, didn't engage parking break, so the van started rolling. yup, it's broken.
Well now you know... If you can get over the awkward... The dick is 10 min away.
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