Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
If I had a quarter for every time I had sex in your bed while you were out of town, I would probably be a lot more willing to buy you new sheets. Hope you're having a nice vacation.
I'll throw in a blow job for your kind ways. Or another booty call. I'm poor and not very imaginative. This is all I have to offer- the unicorn like wonders of my vagina.
No one likes a giant penis on their phone screen. I mean cmon. I'm a lady.
Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.
Hungover in church. I can feel stained glass Jesus judging me.
FYI: Brian said he left me in the bathroom Friday night to shower and 45 minutes later found me with a towel around my head, my pants on and holding my boobs. No more Jell-O shots for me.
I will show up on your front porch in a wet t shirt and some mac and cheese
So apparently my mom hired someone who goes by "DJ Dog Dick" for the family christmas party?
Please tell me I didn't send you a dick pic in the middle of Peter Pan..
So is it your turn now to pretend like dating someone else would stop us from fucking?
I just masturbated at work... Don't know why but I thought you should know
She was riding a razor scooter down the street wearing nothing but a feather boa it was beautiful.
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
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