I fucked a guy named chris tucker last night
walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
Breaking hearts and overdosing on semen. That's my life.
The baby slept soo good last night. Its like he knows the importance of me being intoxicated all weekend.
My going away gift was all of them dancing around with solo cups on their dick and balls...these are my friends
He took a girl home tonight that he was trying to sell a fridge to. She wanted a fridge and got his dick. He's got a talent.
But for real, I had the best sex of my life on that bunk bed
She touched my penis and started laughing. She did the same thing when she blew me.
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
I got laid two nights in a row
And none for Gretchen Wieners...
I am high playing guitar hero naked. Please don't let me die this way
I feel like sleeping with foreign people is a long term investment. It's like a time share. Now when I go to London I have a place to stay.
I turn into such a nice and loving person when I take Vicodin
I felt the need to set off fireworks in the living room while they were having sex upstairs. Yes, they quieted down.
Randomize
