She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
It's like I'm the Little Bo Peep of sheparding dicks.
Only someone with your twisted mind could come up with that simile. Do you sit around and read 'How to turn Beloved Childrens Stories into Sexual Analogies?' This is the 3rd time you've done this.
I let some guy put hot sauce in my asshole for his birthday
He left the bathroom door open so i would hear him masturbate in the shower to make me feel guilty for not putting out but it just turned me on cause i like guys masturbating. weird?
Andrew is trying to convince me that i took your virginity. Please tell me he is lying.
define virginity.
In the 30 seconds it took me to leave the bar I let the barback motorboat me, ripped open a stranger's shirt and bit his chest, then made out with El Camino dude. No, I'm not coming out tonight.
I HOPE YOURE READY TO KICK SOME SERIOUS ASS AT TRIVIA NIGHT TOMORROW NIGHT. also, i hope the birth of your niece goes well. BUT MOSTLY TRIVIA NIGHT.
our flight took off 8 am and the bar didn't close til 5, so we decided it was a good idea to just stay out all night. Drunk logic is awesome. We were all scared we wouldn't get let onto the plane
I vaguely remember making out with his tattoo (?) and giving him an awesome massage and then I passed out on his floor. Shrug
I'm wearing a suit and have no chance of getting laid or robing a casino. I consider this opportunity a failure
He let me finish eating my sandwich while I sat his face. I think I'm in love with this little eager beaver.
He has a bathrroom scale in his room with an alarm attached to it so anything over 150 sets it off and in his drinking stupper he can make a run for it.
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
Would it be inappropriate to send a friend request to the sheriff that fingerprinted me last night???
Don't go to jail over some guy named Bunky
Randomize
