I seem to have left my pride at pride
We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?
i think i was tempted to text while we were making out. like i remember holding my phone up behind his head and just staring at it.
Not much, really baked..... beethoven is AMAZING it's like i'm flying in space with baby jesus
Just saw 1 guy dressed as a cow and another dressed as a shrimp dancing on the side of the road. We're turning around I NEED to dance with them.
Also, am I the only one who noticed he didn't fuck you until after you were technically a cripple? Or am I reading into this too much? Congrats on that btw
I'm sorry I did drugs then got really loud and bitchy at your party and judged your choice in one night stands.
Is it malicious or apart of the healing process if I wipe my ass with his toothbrush?
How do I respond to this?! It's not easy to say "you're hot & the sex was good, but outside the bedroom you scare me"
Wow my largely unnecessary pool of lizard-related knowledge finally came in handy. Are you proud?
I don't know what to say
Apparently you can unlock an iPad by doing a line on the lock screen I'm about to bust that myth
I've never been so excited to have my ass in so much pain.
Enough talk of my burning loins. How is your day?
If you binge watch Bill Nye Saves the World without me you can consider yourself single
Apparently walking into a national conference and proclaiming "i'm here to fuck shit up" is frowned upon.
Who knew?
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