i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
If I were a woman I'd fill my water bra with liquor so that I could sip on it throughout the day.
Just spent the last three hours in the library successfully refreshing facebook
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
someone made her a trophy at 4 in the morning and presented it to her in the bathtub
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
It was like die hard. Except with more penises.
Most men with as many freckles as you aren't vagina magnets. You are an exception to your kind.
Embrace your curves. Cuz we're too poor for a coke habit.
Never thought I'd say this but the maple syrup flavored vodka probably wasn't our best idea
Going through my bras is like traveling back in time through my past hookups and relationships....
Omg you can't vacuum salsa that's just ridiculous
I'm out of prison. Wanna start a band?
You FaceTimed me at three in the morning while you were peeing. Your eyes were glazed over and you showed me your bellybutton.
not sure if actually covered in glitter or just drunk
Randomize