If he looks like a Gremlin DO NOT get him wet.
she needs to go suck a dildo, because she isn't worth a dick
Im sure that doesnt mean its ruined... It was your bithday you get a free "im drunk at 7 am" card
He was completely serious when he said my boobs were like "majestic white clouds."
How long is a courtesy make out supposed to last??
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
So help me Jesus we're never drinking together again. But weekends don't count. Amen.
It's cheaper then a lap dance and you get your hair cut.
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
Finished my senior thesis. How am I celebrating you ask? By drinking gas station white zif out of an empty candle holder by myself. I fucking deserve to graduate.
DONT LET HIM GET NAKED. JUST SAY NO
It was going alright when lo and behold Tom the cock blocking tornado hits. He is the only man I know who doesn't want anyone to fuck girls.
It's definitively the wine. Every time I can drink and work I feel like I win at the game of life.
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
you were so high you asked for half double stack and half crispy chicken sandwich "welded together" in the wendy's drive through
Randomize
