next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
and thats when we got a drunken mammogram in the middle of cvs pharmacy
while you've been gone this has kinda turned into some sort of fivesome-type thing. just thought i should warn you for when you get back
Ps I don't think it counts as being open minded if you didn't know he was missing a leg until you had already started making out.
he tried breathing fire using moonshine and a roman candle. would not have believed it unless i actually witnessed it.
Can't promise anything, there's vodka in my thermos
I think if I set up a series of baby gates up the stairs each one more difficult to undo then the last that should be able to stop your drunk vagina.
Is it weird that I want to have sex wearing my glasses and lab coat while having an actual scientific discussion?
I threw up in a pringles can. how do you think my night went.
That's a good 5 hours of "I have no fucking idea what I did".
Well shit, I would've slept with him if I knew he was gonna be in the draft.
I just let my boss bend me over his desk and spank me. I think that is some sort of American dream.
WHY DID HE INTRODUCE ME TO HIS MOM? CAN'T HE JUST HIDE ME LIKE EVERYONE ELSE I'VE EVER DATED?@!
im drinking out of a pineapple, so yea.
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
Randomize
