she cant drink. allergic to alcohol.
ewwww. she might as well have a dick.
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
I love how our sober spotter means you only have to stay sober enough to type your pin in an ATM
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
I put the extra pregnancy test in my sex toys box as a reminder that my actions have consequences.
So can we talk about how we all three made out with the bike taxi driver in lieu of paying him. I'm not even mad, that's resourceful. You know what married girls would have had to do? They'd have had to pay.
We found him flat on his back, sobbing, 'fuck you stars' at the sky. No more everclear for Derek.
Yeeeaahhh, I'm in no rush to dismiss a level 6 booty-call that pays my bar tabs and understands my Harry Potter obsession.
yeah well, its not like my astrogynecology class is teaching me what i need to know
im almost 90% sure there is no such thing as astrogynecology.
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
This German chick looked me up and down for a while. Then she grabbed my crotch, let go after a few seconds, and said "you vill do". I think I'm gonna like tonight.
All I wanted was to die alone with my dogs....how did I end up here
I don't know if I should laugh or punch you
You are cut off. Your giant penis and crazy awesome sex is ruining my body...
Im getting out of handcuffs then i'll give you a call
I just want to find somebody intelligent enough to trick my parents into thinking she's not a trophy wife. Is that too much to ask?
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