i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
Princesses don't give blow jobs
I puked for half an hour, but I went and danced afterwards, and that made me feel better.
You are so irish.
he was wearing a tuxedo, i was naked...it's a long story.
If I have to go to the hospital can we stop by the liquor store on the way?
She somehow inhaled a tack last night, she's having surgery today.
I HAVE MY OWN TITS FOR THAT AND I CAN GUARANTEE THAT THEYRE MORE GLORIOUS
Just for the record its a bit awkward when you introduced me to your friends at your house as your brother and then insisted in front of them that I sleep in your bed with you
I just learned my tits were fire resistant. I should join the freakin circus
From now on I forbid you to refer to it as a "bed". From now on you must only use the phrase "sex wagon".
My body hates me. Pretty sure I drank 3 pitches full of coffee last night and took two adderal. I slept and ran a marathon at the same time. You should see my bed.
Yes I peed all over myself and lost both my credit cards, who wants to know?
I was on tinder the whole time I was waiting for my pregnancy test results at the doctors.
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
As a paramedic, it's completely unacceptable to black out on a monday. I cant handle 3 dollar shot night.
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