I just saw the host of Singled Out do standup. Holy shit 1995.
She had a muffin-top while wearing a one piece bathing suit. Thats gotta break one of newton's laws or something
its simple. when his lips are on my clitoris i want to marry him. when they are speaking i want to kill him.
I've grown up since last year. I don't give blow jobs as birthday presents anymore.
It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
I guess she thought her walk of shame would be more dignified if she stole my dog
Food lion is just a portal. Cheetos are the goal. Its like not banging a super hot chick cause she is french. She still has the same parts just from a different box.
Now I am going to fly my toy helicopter in the dark.
He professed his love for me while I danced on a picnic table with a bottle of Absolut. I said thank you and walked away.
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
the guy I've been trying to get with saw my brother's genitals before he saw mine, so that's my life.
I just ordered a onesie on amazon in the back of the ambulance while my patient was sleeping. I'm an adult
I. Love. Skype. Sex.
I think it's just been too long since actual dick has been inside you that you only THINK you love skype sex
Like bruh, I’m a free range girlfriend
Fuck your bullshit loser kid and his gluten allergy.
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