To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
Somedays I wish I were a bird. Then people wouldn't be so grossed out when I vomit
You can call me Bill Clinton. I brought 2 good looking Asians home last night.
Feel like bed is flying. Not sure where we're going. Hope there is candy.
Does adding vodka to a protein shake defeat the purpose?
I was tripping balls on the bathroom floor and his dog walked in. The lights in his bathroom have motion sensors, so I thought his labrador retriever was Jesus.
well other than the faint smell of fireworks in the truck you can't really tell the windshield was exploded
Im drinking in homer but I guess Egan got arrestest on an "assault by water ballon" charge but tom actually threw the water balloon in question at the bartender.
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
last karaoke night = doing dmx songs with a guy who threatened to stab me. so yeah I'm coming out.
dude, we need a reunion soon, my vagina needs a deep massage. The kitty is ready to play
By NOT going to the gym, I'm helping my future. I don't want stripping, prostitution, or porn to be viable money making options.
Wine. Check.\nDino chicken nuggets. Check.\n#IssaParty
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
High school drama coach is wasted and wanted me to tell you that I’m good at flip cup and you should be very proud of me
Where the hell are you
Randomize
