I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
have you facebook stalked him yet?
No, I don’t know his last name...
Just google his license plate numb
I'm in my boyfriends bathroom and I shit so bad, there was no toilet paper but his mom's clothes were on the floor and I wiped my butt on her underwear... now it looks like she sharted
Oscar is the man. He keeps getting pictures of hot nude women with messages in spanish saying "i hope you like it" sent to his phone
whose oscar?
the baller who i guess decided to give out a fake number at the bar last weekend. luckily that fake number was mine. i have enough porn to last me until next month.
I woke up this morning and saw that I had transferred $0.75 from my savings account to my checking account.
He told me I couldn't drink an unopened bottle of water he had in his room because that was his emergency bong water
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
I may have broken a few toes and my face hurts. I do know that I pissed the bed so at least I've got some closure there
you kept introducing yourself to guys as "never going to happen"
He's just giving off this "someone be a bitch to me" vibe
I need a hug and tequila
I'm sitting next to a milk crate full of tequila right now
This is why we need to live in the same city again
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
Is there a tactful way to ask "how are your balls?" Or do I just ask point blank
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