I had a long pep-talk with my penis that ended in "I love you, I'll try harder and I'm sorry."
he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
There's a high school volleyball camp on campus this summer. I'm definitely going to jail.
I feel like college is just one giant drunken trip to Taco Bell
Plotting your own moral demise should not be this fun
Going to get a "plan B"urrito
I just had my first boner in 64 days today....glad to find out my fluids are still pumpin
So. Do you think marshmallow vodka in hot chocolate while eating a graham cracker would = s'mores?
In some strange universe, yes
but they dont look like handprints. looks like someone had a boxing match with my tits and my tits lost
I woke up sick this morning, maybe sucking a random dudes finger at a bar last night wasn't that clean of an idea.....
don't judge my taste in strippers
Don't blame me. My vagina leads me astray.
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
I'm gunna wear a purple dress, so if you see someone looking confused and lost wearing purple it's probably me
Randomize