She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
i did the responsible thing and pissed myself...
My costume is made up of 4 inch heels and a firefighter costume I'm borrowing from the dramatic play area of my Pre-K classroom. I told you I could still be slutty on a teacher's salary.
i think every time you texted me i responded with 'bathroom floor'
Cognac is not meant to be taken in shots. I just wanted you to know the desperation of last night.
They got their marriage license when they were at the courthouse for her arraignment.
I want to lick his teeth again. Is that a creepy thing to say?
I just read "to infinity and beyond" as "to infidelity and beyond" something is seriously wrong with my psyche
Because I'm sitting in a bath of my own wisdom and drowning my sorrows in coconut rum
I think I sent pictures of my boobs to an Olympic athlete...
Also I just had a pointless meeting and the only thing I accomplished were my kegals
God dammit everything I said last night about jungle juice being awesome just does not carry over into the next day
Is it weird that I have your number saved in my phone as baby Jesus?
Starting to realize that fucking everyone I come across isn't the most... "adult"... coping method.
the bucket list is making me question my morals...and sexuality
Randomize