Soo....this goes on the list of odd coincidences. My gyno calls me while I'm going at it, leaves me a message. I check it later... thank God I tested negative.
My toast was "here's to being positive, and testing negative... Cheers!"... after that chick gagged on her shot, everyone knew.... slut.
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
I just inadvertently flirted with my coworker's 20-year old son. I've known him since he was 14, yet suddenly he looked different.
You are nothing if not reliable.
You just kept mumbling, "Shit shit shit, the muffin man owes me money." Repeatedly.
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
I cannot even. Taco bell reception. Beers. New friends from Georgia.
Just FYI, I'm breaking up with my boyfriend tonight and you need to be on call to be my first rebound bang
She told me she was eating frosting, then I got the weirdest boner ever
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
If you loved me you'd bring cheese fries and a condom
I quit life. I got pulled over on my way to work and they towed my car and dropped me off at work in a cop car
I kept yelling "BY ORDER OF THE PEAKY FUCKING BLINDERS" in a terrible brummie accent at everyone I saw wearing a flatcap.
Randomize
